Finding Ourselves

As a part of our early developement, we encounter situations where we feel scared, helpless, and stuck. To create safety for ourselves and survive these moements of overwhelm, we often resort to ways of being that establish safety and security. However, these ways of being take us farther from who we truly are inside and create patterns of armor designed to create safety and bring approval and validation in our relationships. Overtime, we start experiencing these armors as limiting and they start burdening us. For example, do you realize that you like to help and please people out of kindness or being nice? Do you go out of your way to be nice and please others at the cost of your own feelings and needs? What happens is that we are making contact with these armors as ways that are no longer serving us. This is a painful place to be as we do not necessarily know any other way of being and even if we do, it is terrifying to abandon a way of being that has become a part of who we are and make contact with the unknown. If I am not going to get out of my way to please others, what am I going to do then? What does this mean? Am I not that nice person that I've known myself to be? How will I get poeple to like me? Who am I without that face now? Yes, this can be a terrifying place to be. And yet, as one of my favorite authors, Anais Nin, said: "And the day came when the risk to remain in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom", a time comes when we feel pushed from the depths of our being to dicover a new way of being in the world, a more AUTHENTIC SELF. This is a moment of waking up to the possibility of a more fulfilling life that you deserve to live. It might not be easy, but sure it won't be as hard as feeling stuck and burdened by those limiting ways of being and how that sucks up your vitality, joy, and cretaivity. You also do not have to go through this on your own. In therapy, we work towards discovering and embracing your authentic self by objectively looking at how these limiting ways of being hold you back and how to invite and awaken parts of you that offer more fulfillment and joy.